Five of the weirdest car games

Car games are a simple concept, aren’t they? Pick a car. Pick a track. Away you go.

However, there are some car-based games out there that have dispensed with this conceit to forge their own path, offering an interesting slant on the genre, leading to… varying results.

1) Stick shift

Stick Shift is, in the words of its creator Robert Yang, ‘an autoerotic night-driving game’. 

Yes, you read that right.

Players are tasked with executing perfect gear changes (using your mouse) as they drive along a darkness-infused highway, with each well-timed shift resulting in your avatar experiencing ‘pleasure’ (expressed in a not-too-dissimilar way to that infamous Vince McMahon meme).

It’s weird, very weird, and its gear stick metaphor is as subtle as a brick to the face, but with a run time of around five minutes Stick Shift doesn’t outstay its welcome.

Stick Shift can be downloaded for free on PC. I’m going to advise that you don’t, however.

2) Nightmare Kart

Moving onto something less grubby, Nightmare Kart is a Bloodborne-inspired kart racer that has recently shorn its highly publicised legal issues to stand on its own two feet.

Although still clearly inspired by From Software’s epic RPG, Nightmare Kart’s unique twist is that it crosses Bloodborne’s gothic-inspired aesthetic with the battling mechanics of Mario Kart to produce a good game. And it’s free to download on PC (operating via a ‘pay what you want’ policy).

Developer Lilith Walther has also added another twist, in that Nightmare Kart has been produced as an original PlayStation-era demake, giving it an extra, horror-tinged charm. (Argh! Blocky polygons! The horror!).

Game mechanics from Nintendo’s classic karter, like drifting and boosting, are present and correct, with multiplayer split-screen, stunts and a varied cast of characters fleshing out the game’s expansive career mode. 

And if you’ve ever fancied offing a Goomba with a shotgun mid-race, you’ll feel right at home in Nightmare Kart. Weapons pickups, (big guns rather than banana skins) help take care of the myriad of monsters littering the game’s 15 tracks, including extra-challenging boss fights! Mama mia!

The best bit is, Nightmare Kart is actually a well-made kart game with convincing handling mechanics.

Take that lawyers!

3) Pacific Drive

Pacific Drive sees players tackling supernatural occurrences in the Pacific Northwest region of America, exploring the desolate Olympic Exclusion Zone to gather resources and figure out just what the hell happened there.

Your only means of conveyance is your trusty jalopy, which you must upgrade, maintain and repair to keep you safe from the unmentionable horrors surrounding you.

The end goal is to escape the Zone, but to do this you need to keep your car functioning, creating a bond as your car succumbs to various status effects due to damage caused by mysterious anomalies.

Ultimately, you care about your car because it cares for you, with your garage headquarters acting as a safe haven between missions. 

Through its challenging gameplay and atmospheric, other-worldly setting, Pacific Drive is the true definition of Drive to Survive 

(‘Pacific Drive is a video game’, said Will Buxton, probably).

4) Drive Girls

Drive Girls may well be the strangest driving game here. It’s also pretty pants.

Developed as a PS Vita exclusive, 2017’s Drive Girls sees players take control of [checks notes] one of five girls who can transform into supercars [checks notes again]. Really?

Yes. Amid a mechanised bug invasion, you must use your car/girl of choice to defeat the invading force by driving and fighting in both car and human forms. Winning battles helps unlock better car parts and improves your chosen character’s armour stats, with the plot explained by way of cartoony vignettes.

If you’ve ever wanted to weaponise a Honda Civic then this is the game for you, but its insipid combat and even duller racing sections make this an acquired taste, especially with its untranslated Japanese voice acting.

Its anime aesthetic is charming in a way, but if there’s a lesson to be learned from Drive Girls, it’s that cars are undoubtedly the saviour of the human race (don’t @ me).

5) Driver: San Francisco

Although the Driver franchise featured some fabulously simple car chase games, Driver: San Francisco was the first to introduce the ‘Shift’ mechanic, where players could teleport into the driving seat of any nearby vehicle.

That’s not the strangest aspect of the game though, as players need to suspend their disbelief further thanks to the game’s main protagonist, FBI agent John Tanner, being in a coma. 

Tanner lives out the hunt for his nemesis Jericho in a hallucinatory dream state, taking in vital information about the emerging situation via overheard TV broadcasts before finally waking up to crack the case.

By and large, Driver: San Francisco follows the established Driver formula by featuring a lot of overpowered and under-gripped muscle cars (over 140 in total) and plenty of action-packed car chases. It also featured an impressive number of licensed models from the likes of Alfa Romeo, Chevrolet, Ford, Lamborghini and Volkswagen. Dodge is also represented in the form of Tanner’s sweet, sweet 1970 Challenger R/T. 

The series’ famous ‘Film Director’ mode also made an appearance after being omitted from Driver: Parallel Lines, allowing players to create and share their epic car chase sequences, with local and online multiplayer making its debut too.

If you’re a car buff who’s always wanted to descend from a coma-induced hallucination into a Group B Audi Sport Quattro S1 E2, you’ll love it.

Special mention: Fast & Furious Crossroads

On the face of it, there’s nothing weird about the Fast & Furious Crossroads‘ premise. 

The Slightly Mad Studios-developed title featured the cast of the hit movie franchise and was set to be an action-packed romp filled with cars, explosions and over-the-top set pieces.

It turned out to be an absolute turd, however, and was about as appealing as a diesel spillage smeared across a roundabout (not a euphemism).

Bizarre.